The story of a young woman bumping into the enigmatic sorcerer Running Deer and her initiation into the sorcerer’s world and mastering conscious dreaming. It takes the reader throughout the magic realms of the unknown and gives a new approach to the traditional training of women sorcerers.
Excerpt
“I found it exciting to see how bluntly you took the Magic Mushrooms.” Vidar throws a kitchen towel over his shoulder, walks towards me and places his hands on the back of his chair.
“Exciting? What do you mean exciting?” Am I mistaken or is he giving me hungry looks.
The other day when we were talking on the phone I had no reserves when I told him I wanted to continue the training, but now I begin to doubt. Vidar returns to the kitchen counter, takes the mugs of red hot chai tea, places one on the table in front of me and sits down.
“You might also call it courageous.”
“What do you need courage for?” I ask him annoyed, “it’s part of the training, isn’t it? Tell me, what do you mean?” I hardly find myself courageous, rather impulsive, but never without feeling right about something.
“Matee taught you during the first encounter the art of the warrior. And the warrior has the attitude of courage and deals with everything as though it’s the most ordinary thing, but you are of a higher level,” he says presumptuous, “to be exact you are one step higher, because you have the courage of a person of knowledge and you only reach that through spiritual bravery.” Vidar goes over it again: “You are passed the level of warriors and are still in the stage of early infancy as far as woman of knowledge is concerned.”
The only courage I can think of is admitting to him earlier on the phone that I have feelings for him, more than I can bear. I had finally put my fear of rejection aside. I was whining on the phone, telling him that I found all these feelings extremely confusing, but that I was proud of myself that I finally dared to admit it. I can still hear myself say with a trembling, peeping voice: “I have such strong feelings for you!” It was really terrible to have to do, but there was no way around it. After the last session I felt an overwhelming love, my love no longer felt scattered, but glued together like a firm whole, as though at that moment I knew how love truly feels. Yes, in the end I had faith he would react in a positive way, what would it matter anyway. In the worst case he would reassure me by saying that it was all part of the whole process and that things would blow over spontaneously. At best he would say he shared my feelings.
I felt greatly relieved to hear Vidar requite my feelings. I was in heaven. “Of course,” he said “we are united on a spiritual level and are part of the same spiritual family.” But for the time being I had to put my feelings aside, because he was going to visit family at the Southeast Coast of the States for a month. Of course, this trial left every room for doubt. Impatiently I kick the table-leg with my foot.
Vidar sits down and watches me radiantly. A warm wave runs through my heart and I abandon my built up reserves. “Are you familiar with the expression “she runs with wolves” he asks.
“It sounds familiar.”
“It’s important to show your true feelings, like a wolf breaking free from the pack, running across the tundra. The wolves play together, our feelings do the same. ‘She runs with wolves’ is one of the biggest compliments one can get, we need it to get to the second reality. We travel to the second reality through the lines of intent stretching out in front of us. Or it’s actually different,” he corrects himself, “you will see that the second reality comes to you instead of you going there.”
Without any reserve he says: “It’s important your true feelings are free and are no obstruction.”
I understand our love is definitely no coincidence. I suddenly remember I dreamed about a wolf the other night. From a safe distance a hunched wolf watches me in a dacor of clouded skies and green hills. I don’t move, because with every step he will be scared off, I am sure of that. After I have waited patiently and won his trust, he dares me to follow him. He awaits me further down, in a farmyard, underneath the roof of a shed. Very carefully I come closer until he is ready for me to stroke him and he starts to roll over in the dry grass. Only then I see it is a male.
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Copyright 2010 Alysa Braceau, Dreamshield. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, recording or otherwise, without the prior written permission of the author.
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